EhhOhh !♥
♥Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Hello Mother Father ,
its been decades.
yes, indeed.
but somehow, i can't seem to spill the words out from my mind.
i will try.
so.. here i go.
I understand. ;your love for me have faded. im sure it will vanish soon.
im not the girl you are proud to be with anymore.
im the girl that creates a lot of burdens in your beautiful perfect life.
i have nothing special in me to bring something new into your life.
i have never lighten & brighten up your life the whole time.
i never try to understand you & give yourself a space.
all i did, is depend too much on you.
But..
i did that because i love you. maybe a little too much.
i even missed you until i shed tears.
i couldn't tell you why..
i said i was stupid just to hide my embarrassment.
my tongue was too numb.. so i prefer to tell you this way..
if you happen to read this though..
i miss how we treated each other so special..
we shared the moments & stories about how we never been treated this way.
do you remember all that?
i hope you do, because i did.
However, haven't you realise what had happen to us?
im not gonna elaborate though but im very sure you understand what i mean.
or maybe this happens to show signs that we both are actually not meant for each other?
i can't bring myself to face that fact..
because i dont wanna let you go..
i need you.
but how can i try to escape whereas theres no exit doors.
therefore.. if you wanna leave me..
i let you go..
but dont tell me im heartless but..
ive let you go because i love you so much.
even if i let you go.
your still with me.
where?
a place where no one could enter but only you.
a room painted red but no windows or any doors.
my heart.
im shedding tears while typing this.
its been too long i kept this in me.
when i tried to explain..
i do not dare.
im sorry for asking you to leave me alone.
but seriously..
if only i could tell you that i wanted you to be with me everytime,not even a second without you.
i love you.
so much..
believe me,baby.



P/s: hardest decision ever. painful but just can't do it.

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